WHY IT'S OK NOT TO BE OK

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I’m writing this as I am lacking inspiration, so that I can share the reality of life.

Not everyday is going to be a success. Not everyday is going to be unproductive either, ok? 

You’ve heard the saying, “it’s ok not to be ok.” BUT I’m here to share WHY and the benefits of understanding the truth behind why it’s ok not to be ok. Make sense? 

If you’ve ever had a bad day, been in a funk or have gone through a difficult time, then keep reading because I’ve got your back.

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I personally feel that in moments of silence is when I begin to feel most inspired.

Most motivated. Most aware. Aware of myself, my surroundings and become mindful. This leads to a flow of new ideas and sparks. Not always, but a majority of the time. 

To be honest, these ideas, inspirational moments and sparks do not happen just from sitting in silence for a couple hours.

When you aren’t ok, the idea is to sit in silence, feel and acknowledge that you are not ok and work through it. 

It is within THAT moment, you will be able to dig yourself out. However, understanding that the only way to be OK is to validate that you are not ok. 

Listen, I know this can be confusing, and I know I’m throwing a lot of words at you guys, but they are words of value and words that have helped me through rough times. 

On days where I lack inspiration, on days where I am feeling quite low, on days where I just want to lay in bed in cry, I have to realize that it is ok.

By realizing that it is ok to FEEL, I can move forward. In those moments where I FEEL is that silence where I get that spark. 

It can take a couple hours, a couple days, a couple weeks or in some cases a couple of months. Welcoming those feelings will only help them to move by faster. 

But, why? 

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Because we are taught to constantly “move on!”

What happens when you “move on” without dealing with not being ok?

You let that build up. And up. And up. And up. Until one day… you build up anger, resentment, depression, anxiety and bad feelings! 

We aren’t about that. 

We ARE about dealing with challenges that come our way head on. It’s not easy, you know? It never will be. But, you have to understand that in order to be ok, you have to let yourself not be ok, got it?

The longer you PUSH and PUSH and PUSH away those negative feelings, the longer they last. 

That is WHY it is ok not to be ok.

I wrote this as a reminder to myself and to all of you who might be feeling the same way as I do in this moment.

I’ve faced a lot of death in the last few months. I’ve faced a lot of stress the last few months. I’ve avoided dealing with these situations the last few months. I’ve only felt worse. 

This week, I decided enough was enough.

I decided to do some investigating. To find out what happens when I just allow myself to feel bad. I had some productive moments this week where I felt ok, and in the moments where I felt horrible, I stopped what I was doing and felt horrible. 

The relief that I felt from doing this, was unreal, ok? I haven’t had this much relief in months.

By understanding that I wasn’t ok, and by allowing myself to feel bad, I had a revelation. It opened my mind. It helped me to see clearer. It helped me to push through. It helped me to not “move on,” but move forward. Someone taught me about this mindset.

  • My grandfather passed away 11 months ago.

  • My cousin passed away 7 months ago after battling cancer.

  • My dog, Cooper passed away on my birthday in January. 

As I am writing this I have tears coming down my face. I want to be as real and vulnerable as I can in my posts because the truth is that we all face struggles. We all face difficult situations in life. It’s normal. 

What I’m struggling with most are the deaths. 

  1. The fact that I got a call at 10:30 pm on my birthday that my precious dog had collapsed and was in the animal hospital. He had been with me through the lowest points of my life. 

  2. The fact that I saw my grandfather and cousin struggle and fight horrible battles that they had lost. 

The fact that they are no longer with us. I have developed a fear of loss. The fear of losing people closest to me. The fear of being alone. The fear of losing anything that I care about.

Like I said, I’m not the only one who faces painful emotions. We must validate these emotions, feel these emotions and from there, we can then see the light. 

HOW TO FEEL YOUR EMOTIONS

4 Tips For Facing Our Feelings

  1. Write about what you are feeling

  2. Sit in a cozy place and just let your mind go 

  3. Speak to a professional

  4. Allow yourself 24 hours to do absolutely nothing, but feel

HOW TO FACE THE EMOTIONS

3 Tips For Coping

  • Allow yourself to cry

  • Remind yourself that it is OK to feel this way

  • Journal about the experience 

What I don’t want you to do is avoid.

Know that this is ok. And by doing this, you will get through to the other side. 

I hope you found this post valuable and please send me an email or a message with any questions you might have. I am here to help!


XO,

Sydney

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