IT'S OK TO BE DIFFERENT
WHY WE WANT TO FIT IN
Growing up, all we want to do is fit in, right? Whether you want to be popular or just accepted by your peers, the goal is to be well-liked.
…and sometimes, being well-liked means sacrificing who you truly are.
When I was younger, I was traumatized by bullying. I really just wanted to fit in. I wanted to be well-liked. I didn’t want to be laughed at or made fun of for being me.
So, I tried so hard to NOT be myself.
Being myself meant…
Accepting that I am quiet
Accepting that it’s ok to have anxiety
Accepting my quirky sense of humor
Accepting that I don’t like all of the same things as my peers
…accepting every aspect about me that I was made fun of for.
Why would I want to do that when I could just pretend to be someone else?
The problem was that deep down, I felt that rejection and loneliness because I didn’t understand why people didn’t like me for me.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE AREN’T OURSELVES
Trying to be someone else doesn’t make you feel good. It might make things easier TEMPORARILY, but the longer you go on trying to put on a fake persona, the worse you feel about yourself.
…and throw away your self confidence too at that point.
A lot of the time, these habits start when we are young! When we are in school and trying to figure out who we are.
HERE’S THE THING…
When we are put into a system with a group of people who are also trying to figure out who they are, clicks begin to form. Opinions begin to form. Insecurities begin to form and come out.
THEN, people act on those insecurities and hello bullying + goodbye self esteem.
It’s part of growing up.
SOCIETY DOESN’T GET IT
This system expects all of us to be the same.
To learn the same.
To think the same.
But, they forget that life is a journey. Life doesn’t have to be figured out before and by the age of 18.
Now, we can say hello to the pressure at such a young age.
To know who we are
To know what college we want to go to
To know our career path
If you don’t know this by 18, well… you’re kind of f*cked in the eyes of society. That’s pretty discouraging at such a young age and doesn’t allow us the space to be who we want, you know?
As many of you know, I dropped out of college at 20 because I decided to take my own path. Not the path that society told me was necessary.
That’s when I learned to love myself.
THE REALITY OF BEING YOURSELF
When I decided to take my own path is exactly when I looked back and realized that who I truly was as a person WAS NEVER weird. It was different.
Those are now my proudest moments.
That system that we are put in at such a young age teaches us a LOT.
At such a young age, we don’t know what it really means to be ourselves. We don’t know if it’s ok. We just want to fit in.
The crazy thing is that once we grow up, we begin to realize that what makes us different makes us authentic, and that makes us unique, which THEN gets you further in life.
When you are your authentic self, you are your best self. You feel better, and when you feel better, you do better.
It isn’t always easy to accept ourselves. I’ve had to put in a lot of hard work to learn to love myself.
Because after many years of “trying to fit in,” I realized that “fitting in” wasn’t for me. It wasn’t who I was. I was me, and not being me was making me miserable.
So, go out there. Be you. Do you. For you.
( love that saying )
Because at the end of the day, this is YOUR life. When you begin to live your authentic life, you begin to ATTRACT what’s meant to be on your path. You begin to attract the right people, jobs and opportunities.
Let’s not forget about happiness. You begin to feel more fulfilled.
I want to challenge you to start indulging in self love. Learn to love who you are. Because there is no one out there in the world like you!
What makes us different, makes us special.
…and as my mom always says… “If everyone was the same, this world would be a pretty boring place.”
What makes you different? Comment below!